I began my first mindfulness class tonight, as part of my wellness coaching program. I have been meditating in the morning since the spring, but I have no real practice with mindfulness, other than more recently concentrating on being in the present and letting go of what I can't control (which is just about everything!).
I learnt that "non-striving" is an attitudinal factor of mindfulness, and I was very happy about this, because I have trauma from my distant kundalini yoga practice that was a direct result of striving. Over exertion and nearly impossible standards led to very real health concerns. I subsequently turned to the Christian faith, where I felt free from excessive demands.
Therefore, I have not had any real connection to yogic teachings in over a decade. The severity of my fallout repelled me from almost all forms of Eastern thought, so I felt some apprehension having to take this course. But when I discovered that this class is truly about non-bias, I could feel myself open up more and more as the night went on. I even found myself getting excited hearing about Eastern terms again, and reading quotes by yoga teachers.
There is a huge battle between the evangelicals and the new age movement, and for over 10 years I chose a side, with minor slips back to my pre-Christian teachings in the early years of my conversion. But being academically introduced to mindfulness has been very refreshing. Learning from a trusted source takes a lot of the pressure off, and it reminds me that I am autonomous over my own thoughts. and not mindlessly subjected to talking heads on YouTube who have greatly influenced me over the years.
I am very excited to implement a daily mindful meditation routine to my evening schedule, which will also compliment my long-term goal of having a routine of an examination of conscience before bed. I feel happy to be reacquainted with Eastern techniques, and to understand them not as a threat, but rather to know the basic historical recognition for concepts that I was already applying to my life, and this is only fair.
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