A new world came into view

I'm following along on a ten day meditation series that my friend is putting on, and today she briefly touched on the gut and it's intuition. We have all heard this - trust your gut. But something that I learnt is that we hold tension and build-up in our gut when we are anxious, or when we are not living authentically. She mentioned that she had chronic inflammation in her stomach for years, not because of what she was eating, but rather because of the stress and emotions that she was holding in. 

I have been experiencing this for the past year and a half, and it came to a head in September. It got to the point that I went to the doctor because I didn't know what was happening. Of course there was no real diagnosis, and that's okay I just needed to know it wasn't necessarily a dangerous physical problem. I lived with this change in my body, working on accepting it, but never fully resigning to it. But this past two weeks things began to change. 

I started taking a yoga class, and I became more careful about what I ate. But I really think the reason for my relief is that I let go of really harmful situations and people. There is a direct correlation to people who I had let into my life, and when my gut problems started, which wasn't just chronic inflammation, it was chronic constipation as well. This is an important reason why I mention the yoga, because it aids the emotional healing while also reminding the body how it's supposed to move. 

Another reason why I mention my new yoga practice is because it ties into the new people who I now have in my life. I am taking classes from a friend, and I am learning meditation from another friend. I am in contact with kindred spirits, people who help heal me. Not only am I connecting with people who care about me, but I am learning humility in being the student, and not the guru who I've been so desperately trying to be for the past ten plus years. 

So now I am also learning how wonderful, simple, inclusive, loving, and attainable meditation is, such as breath work, body awareness, and the polarity of focus and release. My spirituality and my body are on an incredible healing journey. I am discovering the freedom that comes when I don't have to be in control, when I can let my body do what it needs to do. Because while it was painful even physically on some days to have had that inflammation, I knew deep down my body needed to be respected and complete it's process.

When I began let others help me, I discovered a peace and happiness that is brand new. I am so excited to continue my journey, to learn from my peers and friends, and to pass on to those who will come after me what I have learnt, which I know today is crucial. And this does not mean to pass it on in a master/student dynamic, but from one person who got out of a hole to helping another person get back up, too.

People are coming into my life without me even knowing I needed them, and this is because I am letting God guide me. My mind my soul and my body are being restored, and this is only because I grounded myself through getting humble, through admitting that I had no answers, no solution, only a head full of hot air that was consistently getting me into trouble. And what I found in admitting that I was having mental, physical, and spiritual problems, was that no one judged me, rather I was encouraged to become a part of. And that is the first step.